Sailalai

Eniten ärsyttää kaikki

2012-01-26T14:03:00.001-08:00

Vaalit. Työt. Niiden puute tai olemassaolo. Hiljaisuus. Sen toisen. Kaikenlainen epäselvyys. Ihmisten kumma toiminta.

Miksi pitää olla muuta kuin oikeasti on? Kuka vaatii sinusta parempaa tai huonompaa, villimpää tai vaisumpaa kuin oikeasti olet? Mitä ihminen hyötyy siitä että elää toisten olettamuksissa, mutta ei ole rehellinen lähimmäisille tai itselleen? Kuka sen sanelee? Kertakaikkiaan! Ärsyttää.

Rakkautta ja anarkiaa.

There are roads left in both of our shoes

2012-01-13T19:41:00.000-08:00

Entä jos? Mitä jos? Mitä jos emme onnistu. Entä jos emme asiat eivätkään järjesty ja kengissämme vielä jäljellä olevat tiet vievät eri suuntiin? Kuka sanoo että juuri me onnistumme? Argh. Onko minusta tähän? Pystynkö oikeasti sitoutumaan, uhrautumaan ja odottamaan? Onko hänestä odottamaan, sitoutumaan ja uhrautumaan? Ei ole vastauksia, on vain paljon, paljon ajatuksia.. en malta odottaa oivallusta ja sitä että pääsen eroon tästä valvotun yön, aamuyön tuntien, melankoliasta.

2012-01-08T14:47:00.000-08:00

Where the soul meets body

2012-01-08T04:55:00.000-08:00

And I do believe it’s true
That there are roads left in both of our shoes
But if the silence takes you
Then I hope it takes me too
So brown eyes I hold you near
Cause you’re the only song I want to hear
A melody softly soaring through my atmosphere

Rauhaa ja hyvää oloa

2011-12-24T00:22:00.000-08:00

Kyllä se on nyt niin, että joulu saapui viimein tännekin taloon. On jouluaamu, ulkona on hämärää ja hiljaista. Sisälläkin olisi, jos ei pikkusiskoni kahenksantoistavee katsoisi Pokemonia koko nuoruutensa innolla. Eipä silti, tunnelma on varsin mukava. Kyllä tämä kiireettömyys ja rauha tuntuu hyvältä. Pikkuhiljaa lämmitellään saunaa ja aletaan laitella jouluateriaa, odotetaan veljeä kotiin ja mietitään toisia veljiä omien perheidensä luona. Mietin Häntä siellä kaukana ja olen iloinen tänä aamuna saamastani viestistä: kaikki on hyvin. Illalla istutaan kuusen valossa ja avataan lahjoja ja aamulla mennään joulukirkkoon keskittymään olennaiseen. Vapahtaja on syntynyt.

On monta syytä rauhan ja hyvän olon tuntemiseen. Toivottavasti sinullakin on rauha ja hyvä olo tänä jouluna!

Orpo

2011-12-21T10:58:00.000-08:00

Kyllä ihminen on sitten orpo kun elämänkumppani kuolee. Vähän niin kuin lintu jolta puuttuu toinen siipi.
60 vuotta yhdessä olisi tullut tänä jouluna täyteen, mutta yhteisen ajan sijasta on edessä siipipuoli joulu.
Eikä toisen surua voi lievittää eikä ottaa pois, voi vain antaa ajan kulua ja hoitaa.
Lepää rauhassa Saimi.

Elämä on hyvin. Elämä on hyvää.

2011-12-06T17:33:00.000-08:00

Kyllä vain, edelleen hymyilyttää. Paljon on taas tapahtunut, monenlaista ja kaikenlaista. Odotettua ja odottamatonta. Kuolemaa ja ensimmäistä paniikkihäiriötä.
Huolta ja surua toisten huolista, murheista ja menetyksistä.
Sanottuja ja sanomattomia sanoja, huokauksia ja halauksia.
Kilometrejä välissä, liikaa, liian paljon.
Silti hymyilyttää. Silti jaksaa. Silti voi voida hyvin.
Ehkä on aika olla rikki ja sitten olla eheämpi että toiset voivat olla rikki.
Kaikessa karheudessaan elämä opettaa kuinka läheinen on tärkeä,
ihmisen ei ole hyvä olla yksin.
Jos sinulla on perhe, pidä siitä kiinni. (Sanon tämän siksi että se ei ole itsestään selvää.)
Jos sinulla on ystävä, sano sanat ja pidä huolta.
Jos sinulla on rakas, rakasta kuin viimeistä päivää.

Thaimaalandia

2011-11-12T08:40:00.000-08:00

Täällä taas, kahden vuoden jälkeen koittipaluu Thaimaahan. Tällä kertaa työtehtävissä yhtenä kolmesta henkilökohtaisesta avustajasta. Lämpöä, valoa, allas, thai massage, manikyyri, pedikyyri, tuore ananas ja maaliman murheet kaukana. Niin hyvää ettei sanotuksi saa. Vaan silti, ensimmäistä kertaa elämässä kannan matkallani mukana ikävää. Niin hyvää ettei sanotuksi saa.

Mitä onni on?

2011-10-28T04:58:00.000-07:00

En minä tiedä. Mutta tuntuu että olen onnellinen. Enkä halua luopua tästä tunteesta, olosta, olotilasta, elämästä, ainakaan ihan heti. Muistan ajan jolloin en uskaltanut iloita, tuntea onnea tai tyytyväisyyttä koska aloin jo valmistautua siihen kuinka matto vedetään seuraavan kerran jalkojen alta. Nyt kun takana on raskas elämänvaihe, elämisen halun menettäminen ja sen uudelleen löytämisen odottaminen, en aio enää jäädä odottamaan seuraavaa pettymystä. Se kuluttaa ja näivettää. Eikä elämäni päämääriin kuulu olla kulunut ja näivettynyt.
En myöskään aio muuttua onnellisuuden ja positiivisuuden lähettilääksi, sellaiseksi ärsyttäväksi hymistelijäksi(hieman henkilökohtaista angstia havaittavissa kenties). En aio elää elämääni paremmin ja pidempään, iloisemmin tai avoimemmin. En asettaa uusia tavoitteita ja lähteä juoksemaan niitä kohti sata lasissa. En aio miellyttää tai olla mukavampi. Ajattelin elää ja olla, nauttia ja hengittää. Suosittelen lämpimästi, tähän asti tämä on toiminut vallan loistavasti.

Anaïs Nin

2011-08-23T03:21:00.000-07:00

Kauan sitten silloin läheinen ihminen sanoi että ihmisillä on tapana raahata mukanaan kainalosauvoja vaikkei niihin olisi enää pitkään aikaan ollut tarvetta. Että me pidämme vammoistamme kiinni vaikka väkisin.
Vammoistamme on tullut jo osa meitä, niin vahva osa että sen varaan on voinut rakentaa persoonaansa. Eikä niistä vammoista tuosta noin vain toivuta, tietenkään, ei niistä päästetä irti ja anneta parantua. Silloinhan menettäisimme osan persoonaamme, joltain lähtisi pohja.

"Sitten koitti aika jolloin riski pysyä tiukasti nupussa oli tuskallisempi kuin riski jonka kukkiminen vaati." Anaïs Nin

Mutta entä jos sitten kuitenkin joskus jossain olisi ja tulisi aika että voisi oikaista jämähtäneet luunsa ja karistaa pölyt päältään, antaa tilaa hengittää jollekin joka on ollut kyyryhartioiden alla turvassa pitkään. Ehkä liian pitkään. Olisiko niin kauheaa hengittää vapaana.

Outoa venettä outoon veteen

2011-07-24T14:53:00.000-07:00

Askarrellessa paskarrellessani löysin jälleen kivan runo by Urho Kupiainen jonka kirjan sivuja käytän korumateriaalina, hah! Mutta tällä kertaa löytyi tämmöistä:

Vieras on virta, ja vieras on vene,
eivät ne unelmies uomia mene.
Ilta on ihmisessä, aamu on outo;
illasta aamuun on ihmisen souto.
Illasta aamuun on yöllistä matkaa;
jos jaksat uskoa, jaksat jatkaa.
Taapäin tuijotat, soudat eteen
outoa venettä outoon veteen.

Runon nimi on Soutaja ja meitsi on just niin soutaja tällä hetkellä, että ei muuta ku hymy pyllyyn ja outo vene outoon veteen.

Taikamaa

2011-05-01T13:16:00.000-07:00

En tiennytkään asuvani taikamaassa, mutta asun sittenkin, tämä blogipostaus vei sydämeni, onhan siellä armas pöllötyynyni, kattokaa nyt ja lukekaa muutenkin hyviä pohdintoja elämästä:
www.sammakkolammikko.blogspot.com

MSO:lla asumisen hyviä puolia

2011-03-14T13:11:00.000-07:00

Kun suihkusta ei tule lämmintä vettä

ja keittiön kaappeja pitkin vuotaa katosta vesi,

joku ääliö on tukkinut autollansa tiesi

ja koiran kävelyttäjät eivät kerää lemmikkiensä jätöksiä pihamaaltasi,

on sinulla sentään luonto. Ärsyttävän kaunis, rauhoittava auringonlasku joka saa rakastamaan universumia jälleen ja harkitsemaan "kiitos"-sanan liittämistä niihin vihaisiin "Kerää kakkasi!"-kyltteihin.

Taidekehystämö Kuparinen

2011-03-12T06:46:00.000-08:00

Saarijärven salomailla sijaitsee Taidekehystämö Kuparinen, jossa olen pienestä pitäen käynyt huokailemassa. Isän maalauksiin käytiin valitsemassa sieltä kehyksiä ja joskus lahjaksi saadut maalaukset päätyivät myös Kuparisen hellään hoivaan kehystettäväksi. Nykyään paikkaa pitää yllä alkuperäisen Kuparisen tytär ja tytär on luonut paikasta todella viihtyisän tilan, jonne voisin mennä ihan vain huvin vuoksi istuskelemaan hetkiseksi ja nauttimaan maailman rauhasta, koska ahdistuksen aallot eivät tuota paikkaa tavoita :)

Kauniin miljöön lisäksi taidekehystämö osaa hommansa todella hyvin ja mielestäni edulliseen hintaan, olen aina ollut erittäin tyytyväinen palveluun ja niinpä kehystytän maalaukseni ym. kuvani edelleenkin Kuparisella jos sellaiseen on tarvetta. Oi ihana, ihana Taidekehystämö Kuparinen, ruusuja teille!

Ps. tämä ei ollut maksettu mainos, vaan viime kerralla vieraillessani muistin ottaa kameran mukaan ja taltioida nopeasti minkä kerkesin :)

Yllätin itsenikin

2011-01-31T15:50:00.001-08:00

Nyt kun opiskelut ovat ohi, eikä englanti enää ole se pääkäyttöinen kieli, niin tuli yllättävä halu kirjoittaa suomeksi. Toisaalta saatan olla vähän hukassa suomeksi kirjoittamisen kanssa, että milloin kirjoitan puhekielellä, milloin taasen puhekielisempi kirjoitusasu viehättää enemmän. Silleen niinku. Olen tällä hetkellä toipilas tai "mielenterveyskuntoutuja", niin kuin kämppikseni sen kauniisti ilmaisi. Tosiaan, uusi aika alkaa uuden keikkatyöpaikan ja aktiivisempaan elämään astumisen myötä.
En ihan vielä oikein hahmota itseäni ja sitä missä menevät persoonani rajat. Kuinka reagoin ja mitä voin tehdä. Osaan jo kertoa kuinka voin, mutta en aina tiedä kenelle kertoisin. Niinpä jätän kertomatta ollenkaan ja keskityn muihin.
On raskasta yrittää puolustella itseään itselleen. On uuvuttavaa tsempata itseään ja olla omien voimien tai voimattomuuden kantaja. On uuvuttavaa selitellä toisille.
En häpeä myöntää.
Maailma, olen väsynyt.
En silti jää tähän makaamaan.

Someone else´s life

2011-01-24T09:23:00.000-08:00

I want to be someone else. Younger. Older.
Someone with no qualities like shame, guiltiness and self-criticism. Someone care-free.
What would it feel like?
I doubt there are such a people.. it´s just my distant dream perhaps.
Or there are such people, but they are high and that has never been an option for me.

Getting better?

2010-11-18T13:04:00.000-08:00

It snowed today, December is not that far away anymore, I have found my jewellery inspiration again, finished all my assignments and our thesis is almost ready as well.
These are all very very very good things, but what shows me that I´m getting a bit better is that I don´t use a thick black marker pen to cross over the days that are gone from my calendar. I´m getting better, this will get better and I don´t want to use a thick black marker to cross over the days in my life.

Force to the world a patient smile

2010-10-16T06:54:00.000-07:00

Gosh I´m tired to say: I´m sorry but I can´t.
From now on I will just say: I can´t.
And not promise anything. Not for a while, a long while.

Resources and willpower

2010-10-10T12:20:00.000-07:00

There was an excellent documentary on tv about human trafficking, child soldiers and prostitutes and other forms of nowadays slavery. 250 000 child soldiers. 10 million people in debt bondage. The conclusion was that we could end all of that, all we need is resources and willpower. Nothing else. It is possible.
I have willpower. Resources, anyone?

2010-09-28T02:45:00.000-07:00

take me back to London town
when it felt good to be around

Thesis, my life. Not.

2010-09-17T04:35:00.000-07:00

"While scholars are comparing and constructing theories, debating intellectual questions, and dividing humankind into categories,the world is changed by persons with faith, spirit, emotion, compassion, intuition and irrational thinking." -Grey Owl

Thought of the day

2010-09-15T04:39:00.000-07:00

How can power be given to already equally-righted human beings?

That sure is a good question.

It made me happy for a while

2010-09-13T13:36:00.000-07:00

There is a cover on my sofa that is crocheted by my mum, and so is the pillow on my bed.
A beautifully weaved tablecloth is my temporary rug. My aunt loves weaving.
If you entered my room and looked at the walls, you would see a blue painting.
It´s a present from a dear friend.
Jewellery made by a friend.
A book made by a friend.
Piece of art mabe by my dad,
Pictures taken by friends.
Creativity surrounds me and brings colours to my gloomy, self-created state of mind.

You colour my black and white days

2010-09-10T02:23:00.000-07:00

I wonder who colours your black and white days?

Your heart is an empty room

2010-09-02T14:48:00.000-07:00

Cause all you see is where else you could beWhen you're at home
Out on the street are so many possibilities to not be alone
And all you see is where else you could be,
when you're at home,
There on the street,
are so many possibilities to not be alone.

Night of Arts

2010-08-28T05:53:00.000-07:00

2010-05-25T03:19:00.001-07:00

Do sports, eat well, pay your bills, do your work, take care of others, finish your assignments, earn your money, be creative and funny, work harder, participate, be active, own your rights, serve, love, make babies, hold on the things you love, work more, look good, conversate, carry the weight of the world on your shoulders and never get tired.

She fights for her life

2010-05-21T13:03:00.000-07:00

Weird days, lazy days full of action and energy.

ps. Oren Lavie, rather a nice singer

Snow Patrol

2010-05-09T16:09:00.000-07:00

Laying down and forgetting world does not sound like a bad idea to me.

Laying down in front of a metro entrance looks appealing too.

Facebook Warning

2010-05-05T12:49:00.000-07:00

WARNING!

Facebook now automatically scans your
brain through your monitor. To block, go to kitchen cabinets, remove
box of aluminum foil. Wrap foil around your head, stay calm &
breathe through your left nostril. This is a serious problem & has
been confirmed by my cousin's girlfriend's neighbor's son's baby's mama
and her pet chihuahua. Copy and paste as your status & SAVE YOUR
FRIENDS!!!

Gary Go

2010-05-02T12:51:00.000-07:00

Gotta look myself in the eye
And say it’s gonna be alright
Maybe everything won’t be alright
All the time
I’ve gotta take these chances where they are
It’s gonna be alright
I’ve gotta see things for what they are
At the time

Lost with no place to begin
I’ll slowly adjust to the sun just face I’m in

Restore

2010-04-29T12:43:00.000-07:00

At times I need to restore myself, after it all gets too much and I collapse. It usually takes about a week to restore myself, during that week I am tired,cannot really focus and if someone asks what did he or she just say I might not have the tiniest clue.

I also got a friendship restored this week. Or actually, the friendship never went anywhere or broke down, just communication did. But that´s not what friends are about, about words and communication, right? We continue existing even when words run out.

Last weeks have been challenging.. There has been crisis in many different levels and one of the biggest ones has been cases of death. An "extended family"-member passed away just four days after his beautiful daughter was born and an old friend of mine passed away this week. I hadn´t been in contact with him for a long time, but suddenly all memories became vivid and felt like yesterday.
Sorrow is maybe the heaviest emotion to carry. Whether it´s your own or someone else´s, it doesn´t matter. Either way it weighs a lot and should be given appropriate amount of time. Sorrow needs space and to give the space to it requires courage that most of the people lack, unfortenately.

Human life is weird and cannot really be restored, can it? Rest in peace, dear people.

la la la

2010-04-18T14:11:00.000-07:00

You know those days when your head is full of stuff, it overloads and ends up exploding? Yeah,well I kind of had that today. Praise God, I have friends who are willing to listen to my maniac talks at times. Friends relief Co.

That´s life with a giant L. God is good.

I cried for Afgani soldiers

2010-04-13T13:36:00.000-07:00

Confusion never stops neither losing things, memories and people. I really did cry for afgani soldiers this morning at work while watching news. Well, I had been awake the whole night, but anyway.

I have had great revelations lately. It is awful to notice that you have forgotten how someone´s laugh sounds like. Someone who once was the closest is now only a face among faces in your head. I can recall many people´s laughs, they mean a lot to me (Oh boy, do I sound healthy right now), but just noticed yesterday that there is someone whose laugh I cannot recall. That someone used to be someone special and now... just distant. It is kind of sad that we lose what we have gained, that we as humanbeings are limited and things like this are out of our control. I would love to remember, but I simply cannot.
So many things are out of our control. Memories, feelings, intelligence, laugh, tears, other people.

Blame on Coldplay and a walk in darkening Spring evening for this triggering melancholy.

Nice week

2010-03-05T14:18:00.000-08:00

My sister has been here the whole week, liking it a lot :)

Storm

2010-03-02T12:40:00.000-08:00

It´s funny (and slightly sad) that we tend to easily forget who´s there to help us in everything.

Who am I
That the voice that calm the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

What does not kill you makes you stronger

2010-02-17T15:06:00.000-08:00

Well, as my previous entrance (academic) was slightly negative, let´s bring up something positive, another artist! Wohoo.

This time I am presenting someone, whose fan I have been for a while. When I was a teenager I used to collect postcards with his paintings and clue them on my door. My mum must have been very happy. Anyway, I still like his paintings and art, though I am not cluieng anything anywhere anymore... So here we go: Kaj Stenvall.

He has done oil paintings since 1989. Basically he is painting a familiar character (could be Donald Duck) in various settings.

"Stenvall is fascinated by the transitional line between the comical and the tragic, and vice versa, and his art’s inherent humor – both absurd and tragic – is quite clearly an essential feature of his approach."

If you happen to be in Finland, more presicely not far away from Helsinki, you can go and see his exhibition at:

Galleria Kaj Stenvall
Bulevardi 5
Helsinki

Tue-Fri 11am-5pm and Sat-Sun 12am-3pm

(Picture:http://www.artshop.fi/en/images/kaj_stenvall_painting_veen_art.jpg)

Parekh, my friend, is an ass

2010-01-30T06:19:00.000-08:00

I have been reading to an exam I have not been able to finish earlier and while I am reading this lovely Parekh´s book, I do remember why I have not been that motivated...

"It is true that some categories of humans such as the mad or mentally handicapped may lack some of the distinctively human capacities and would therefore appear to have less or no worth. However, they are rarely devoid of these capacities altogether, and are mad and handicapped in a way that only humans can be. Besides, they are also the sons, daughters, parents, friends and so forth of normal human beings, to whom they are deeply bonded and in whose worth they therefore participate. Furthermore, madness and idiocy are not easy to define.
Once we start denying worth to certain kinds of persons, we run the risk of denying it, or encouraging others to deny it, to a wider class of humanbeings, and hence we have good reasons not to go down that route. Conferring dignity and worth on such persons also test, affirms and intensifies our general commitment to human worth for, if we are able to value them, we are even more likely to value our more fortunate fellow-humans. For these and other reasons, we may rightly grant them eaqual wort."

Great, Bhikhu Parekh, what a conclusion, such a fresh and surprisins point of view
.
For some reason this piece of argumenting made me think about another book I just finished (I don´t recommend that book either).
It was a book about midgets in the time of the second world war, how they were treated and how many so called normal people paid to come and see the amazing freaks, such as some african tribe or midgets living their every day life. It is not so long time ago, I am aware of that. Still, I did not know that such argumenting as above is even hypothetically needed, especially in a book about big terms like "rethinking multiculturalism".

Who let this guy publish a book anyway, it is not that awesome and why do I need it for my studies, really?!

We

2010-01-22T11:48:00.000-08:00

We humans are funny. There might be loads of stress, pressure and sadness in our lifes.
Still green mint tea, good reggae music and making an album of precious memories from a far a way country can fill one with happiness. At least for a while.

The eccentric Spanish Surrealist

2010-01-18T05:24:00.000-08:00

Well, well, I´ve been away for a while, and what I did during that time can be see at: www.namnamvietnam.blogspot.com

What I am doing now is: I´m back to studying and working, anytime soon. This Spring is full of intense and interesting studies as well as other happenings.

Anyway, now I would shortly like to recommend an interesting life story to read or interesting pieces of art to see. Mister Salvador Dalí.

The picture below stopped me at a book store a while ago already and as artists and their life stories have always interested me, I grabbed the book. His life is interesting, go for it guys!!

(Picture from: hilobrow.com/2009/05/10/hilo-heroes-may-10-12/)

"He painted bewildering pictures in which every object has several meanings

-and their interpretation is only possible by examining the work in detail.

Whether in the realm of literature, film, advertising or fashion, a great deal of what is to be found in Dalí´s work can be explained by reference to his biography."

Prestel Art Guide Lifelines: Dalí

From now on...

2009-09-07T12:33:00.000-07:00

... until Christmas you can follow my journey at:

http://www.namnamvietnam.blogspot.com/

Enjoy!!

Basquiat

2009-09-03T08:56:00.000-07:00

I have been reading one of the life stories written of Jean-Michel Basquiat.
I love reading artist´s life stories. And I don´t mean artists like Madonna or Phil Collins, but artists like Picasso or Basquiat.
They were living outside of a box. In many ways, both creatively and self-harmingly.

Admirable and shocking.

Brave and stupid.

Black and white.

Fascinating.

Picture from:

http://srjerman.files.wordpress.com/2008/08/15basquiat_30.jpg

Moody pictures :)

2009-08-16T05:53:00.000-07:00

Where the tourists go wild

2009-07-23T12:21:00.000-07:00

Went to Tallinn with mum. Had a loads of fun, were dead tired at the end and bought nice stuff. We didn´t buy lots of stuff, though previous sentence sounds like that ;)

Happiness

2009-07-15T12:29:00.000-07:00

Weddings were just beautiful last weekend. Sincerely saying: one of the nicest weddings I´ve ever attended.

The atmosphere was relaxed yet graceful :)

I wish you all the best, Eevi & Antti!

ps. My brother also got married last Saturday, by doing do he surprised us all. It was a very pleasant surprise though :)

Picture taken by Anneli Kärki www.siion.fi/sanoinkuvinsavelin/

ps. of course pictures of the wedding couple will be seen later, as soon as they get back from their honeymoon

One bridal shower :)

2009-07-09T00:58:00.000-07:00

Eevi is getting married and needed to have her last days as Miss celebrated

Preparing...

Janika and her beautiful baby tummy :)

She did a bit of a rain dance to collect money.. and she got one euro! And five more later..

We also went bowling, which was.. entertaining.

She also got an Indian head massage, food in a restaurant and the rest of the evening we spent on a cottage, having sauna and lots of fun!

We´ll propably get to see some wedding pictures soon :)

It´s ages since I met you

2009-06-29T15:05:00.000-07:00

Oh yes, I´ve been lazy with this blog as pretty much with everything lately.
You know, I´ve done my job and all the things that had to be done, but that´s it folks.
My home is a mess at the moment and some paper work should be done, but oh well, if my body says it needs sleep and rest, that´s what it shall get. Not too bad.
I have been happy to have some days off and totally enjoy my recently gained clienthood to www.ladyline.fi, which is a gym for ladies only. Just what I needed!
I have also done some jewellery but it has not yet ended up on our website www.oddharmony.blogspot.com, but stay tuned, this week it´ll get there, I promise.

I´ve been missing traveling lately, I really could take a flight anywhere right now and would be totally happy with it. I am flying to Vietnam on 17th of September, which is less than three months away.

Next weekend I´ll be traveling up to central Finland to have bridal shower for Eevi, my friend, and also meet my family, yay!

Be blessed you all!

Where did those days go

2009-06-07T03:10:00.000-07:00

I dislike life strongly sometimes. It does not mean I´m suicidal, it means some days are worse than others.
I also love reading books and it does not mean I´m more intelligent, books are just nice.
I like jewellery designing, it does not make me more artistic, I just like it.

So, some days just are worse than others. No drama, no melancholy.

Picture by Anneli Kärki.

Monkey Face

2009-05-27T09:15:00.000-07:00

I am still alive and having my summer vacation, great three weeks of free time. After this period I will start working and will be so until the second week of August. So in practice it means that goodbye Europe Interrail that I´ve dreamed of and welcome money earning.

Well, my dad´s been in hospital for the last two months and so this time to have my vacation and be in Finland for the summer is actually good. Dad is better now and starting his physical rehabilitation, during last three weeks he has been learning to walk again for example.

Life is life and we just have to deal with it. Luckily God reigns in all circumstances.

Yeeees.

2009-04-29T01:21:00.000-07:00

Well, it´s been silently here lately, and most likely it will continue to be.
I have a lot going on in my life at the moment, so will stop updating this for a while.
I will be back some day though ;)

It´s my sister in the last picture, by the way.

Go and see www.oddharmony.blogspot.com

Days of disbelief

2009-03-28T11:47:00.000-07:00

Reality strike

2009-03-17T13:04:00.000-07:00

Today my colleague found out that I´m a believer. First things she said was:

"This is where my faith ends: when a husband and a father of five kids is taken away, with no reason. He was a good person, so what would be a reason for him to die? It´s different if someone is of harm to others and troubles other peoples lifes, but why did he have to die? I don´t understand. What do you think, how can you believe, when something like this happens?"

She had lost her husband, years ago already, but still she did not understand why he had to go. I wonder if anyone who looses their dear ones too early, understands why. (And do we need to understand, that´s another question.)

Few days after he had passed away, there where some representatives of religion (she did not know if they where Jehovas witnesses or what) behind her door coming to meet her, holding a leaflet "How to live a happy life with your family?" and willing to share their faith. This woman, my colleague, got pretty upset, saying that their family had just lost a husband and a father, how can you come and tell how our family can be happy again?

In the beginning of my working shift I had prayed that God, help me share you with people who I meet, please, give me natural situations, you know I cannot just go and say "Jesus loves, yes He does", so please help me to show them who you really are. This is something I´ve been thinking a lot lately, how to share my faith with other people and I have struggled with it, because I am not at all a person who goes to shout on streets and share leaflets from door to door. (Yes, it might work for some, but...)

During our discussion I didn´t say that much, didn´t defend "those believers", didn´t offer advices, didn´t tell her all the answers I could have said. I simply listened, said a few words about God and my faith and continued listening. God only knows what He´s up to in her life..

All I´m saying is that sometimes people need more an ear to listen to them than a hand handing out a leaflet to tell them what to do.

"I don´t know why. God does."

Namaste! Hello! Merhaba! Bonjour! Terve!

2009-03-14T02:18:00.000-07:00

Mamamamaaaa

2009-03-10T11:48:00.000-07:00

Uaaah, first of all I´ve eaten too much sweets lately, second of all I haven´t had a chance to go to work for a few weeks, which sucks, and third of all I seem not to know how to play even the tiny bit of guitar I used to know (the three accords) or sing. Minna, I might have to perform you a dance on your birthday, you see.
This is one of those days. Slow and annoying and overly sweet because of all the extra sugar that´s in me right now, yak!

A short note

2009-02-28T13:27:00.001-08:00

I´ve started my practical placement, so now I´m a trainee, as you can see from what I´m carrying daily with me. Mostly when I´m in my placement, but sometimes I forget that I still carry it with me when I´m outside my placement. Haa haa.

My pretty sister visited me during her winter break, we had a good time. Saga especially, with the chocolate. Right, Saga?

We´re beautiful, it´s true.

And we made muffins.

Here are few pics from my Saarijärvi-visit, here´s my niece. Mari, don´t kill me for putting this in here, one cannot see your face. I like the pic :)

Ah, winter.

Just to let you know I´m fine, busy, but fine :)

Saarijärvi-holidays

2009-02-19T02:03:00.000-08:00

Here is our hairiest family-member, Iines. (Hardly beats my dad though.)

Yesterday I drove to Saarijärvi for a short visit and this morning woke up nicely to the smell of fresh coffee, made by someone else than me.
After that I read the local newspapers (they have opened a new cafe and one of the famous artists around here has passed away, for example) and went for a walk with Iines.
Oh man, what a beautiful weather it was (and still is), just perfect for a walk in the forest.

Well then, some brief history of Iines. She came to our family about six years ago on the 19th of January 2003. At that time she was about one and a half years old.

Before arriving to our home, she was given away to another family. That family could not take care of her, as they had small kids and all, so she was brought back to her first owner. However, her first owner was pretty sick at that time and did not take proper care of her and her mom. They were hold in a cellar tied to a radiator with an one meter long chain, staying for days without food.

A mother of a friend of ours went to take care of those dogs while their owner went to a hospital. At that time she saw how in a bad shape those dogs were and knew that we were looking for a dog. She contacted us and I was the only one who could go and see the dog at a certain day.
So I went and decided to take her with me right away after seeing her. She was skinny and wild, could not behave and totally panicked in the car. She had no manners and when she arrived to our house, first thing she did was to pee on our living room floor.

Inside our house she just ran around and while given food, she ate and ate and then threw up. She did not know when to get food the next time. She was a pretty disturbed dog.

Now, as several years have passed, with many many experiences with her, she has become a playful lady with a good appetite and a lot of energy. Despite her playfulness and energy she loves to lay around our house on different spots and as close to us as possible. Inside our house she knows how to behave and where to be and outside she enjoys nature as much as possible. She is a true Finn and loves to roll in the snow :)

So, I enjoy spending time with her as well as the rest of our family.
Take care you all!!

Daughter of a Pulla Master Mama

2009-02-10T12:17:00.001-08:00

My Mum is the official Pulla-Baking-Master. She bakes it soooo well. So, from time to time I´ve been trying to bake pulla, just in case I would have that Pulla-Master-Gene in me. Unfortenately it seems that I don´t. However, today I gave it a go an they are... eatable. I should be happy, that is a progress already.

Yes, I know. Raw Pulla-pastry looks like it would have come out of someones nose. And yes I know you all will love eating pulla after this beautiful thought.

Have a pulla-like week!!

ps. If you want to see something nice, go to www.oddharmony.blogspot.com. There you´ll find out what I mean. It is exciting. Leave comments there, if you feel like´.

My day 04.02.09

2009-02-04T11:05:00.000-08:00

1. I had to leave my dear bed..
2. ..in order to drive to school...
3. .. and have my breakfast there as I had some extra time.
At this point I was in school until around 12 o´clock, no pics, sorry.
4.Went to have some hot chocolate with a friend after school. We also went to library :)
5. At home: Jewelleries to come :)
6. A little nap.. of about an hour. I was so tired.
7. Dance lesson around 18.30

And now I´m dishwashing,eating, blogging, reading e-mails and preparing some things for the coming days.. (more of that later). Nice day it was, pretty relaxed.

27/01/09

2009-01-27T12:58:00.000-08:00

I´ve had a nice day, but I´m too tired to write anything that would make sense. Anyway, I just got to hear today that I´ll propably get to work in a chilren´s home when I get to Vietnam. It´s great news, as it wasn´t too clear at first where they´re gonna place us. Now we know :) Hope so.

(Haha, for some reason I make a lot of pink (and blue) jewelry nowadays. Don´t ask me why,I dislike both colours pretty much.)

Warning: girly news

2009-01-25T12:05:00.000-08:00

Made by me. So relaxing, so nice. Have a nice start of the week!!

Made by

2009-01-25T02:43:00.000-08:00

So, this is something that I´ve done lately while escaping all the other things that would need to be done, great!
I´ll add some more pictures later today, there are some more. Now I need to fly, off to work.

Here I am, escaping

2009-01-21T12:17:00.000-08:00

I SHOULD be writing a page of Finlands immigration policies, but no, here I am, so desperate that I even found time to write in here.
It is amazing how one can have energy and enthusiasm towards all the things not necessary and the things necessary,like cleaning, school assignments and jogging alone, are sooo hard to start with.
So, anyway, this coming spring will be rather busy. I knew it already during the Christmas break but what I did not know, is that we, who are doing our practical placement abroad next autumn, need to start working on our thesis. And we need to start right now. Niiiice.
If some of you don´t know, I am going to Vietnam next Autumn to do a practice placement that has to do with our studies. The final destination is not that clear yet, but still we need to start organizing things for it. *Phew*

Life is funny. I would like to dance, make jewellery, eat well and meet nice people. I would not like to study, work, have any responsibilities and have any need to accomplish anything. Sigh. Don´t get me wrong, I enjoy these sometimes as well and anyway these are just feelings. Where would I get if I acted all the time according to my first feelings? Let me tell you, I would not get up from my bed in the morning if it depended on my feelings :) I do not FEEL like getting up, but I DO get up. That´s life. And these all parts belong to it, if I didn´t have responsibilities or duties, it would not be my life then.

I think I need to stop writing this nonsense and write a bit of our immigration policies. Opinions, anyone?

Finally it arrived

2009-01-12T08:17:00.000-08:00

SAY IT TO ME NOW

I'm scratching at the surface now
And I'm trying hard to work it out
So much has gone misunderstood
This mystery only leads to doubt
And I didn't understand
When you reached out to take my hand
And if you have something to say
You'd better say it now

Cause this is what you've waited for
Your chance to even up the score
And as these shadows fall on me now
I will somehow

Cause this is what you've waited for
A chance to even up the score
And as these shadows fall on me now
I will somehow

Cause I'm picking up a message Lord
And I'm closer than I've ever been before

So if you have something to say
Say it to me now
Say it to me now
Say it to me now

Life is all about colours. Right.

2008-12-30T14:15:00.000-08:00

1. My new ring, add up the boost a bit. I could kill with this. It´s a nice colour too, so I didn´t buy it only for hitting people.

2. & 3. This is why free time was invented: so that one could do things that one enjoys. Handcrafts it is.

I have also met some friends last Saturday, girls from my high school years. (As if that was such a long time ago.) Many things have changed though we have not been that many years apart.

And these are a part of a Christmas present from

a friend. (You know who you are.) I really really like them, the colours and the recycling idea. (Fabrics are recycled, right?)

I have also been: -reading

-meeting a whole bunch of nice nice people

-shopping

-going out with the doggie dog Iines

-enjoyed my family, little sis is great :)

-sleeping late

-trying to schedule my beginning of the year 2009

-doing very bad in the previous scheduling

-eating a lot of chocolate

-attending one of my dear nephews 3rd Birthday party

-following a lot of blogs

-silent

-watching "Once" and parts 1 and 2 from The Lord Of The Rings, tomorrow is

the day for the 3rd movie

-and a lot of other stuff to which I usually don´t have the time or patience ;)

Greetings, "The one who loves holidays.".

Once

2008-12-29T12:51:00.000-08:00

I just watched the movie "Once" and loved the music so much that I went straight after to cdon.com and ordered the sound track. Believe me, that does NOT happen often. Actually never before. So it had to be really good. Or then this whole free time has driven me nuts.

Highly recommend it. Not a typical story, not too romantic (romantic=dangerous, right, girls?? Didn´t we talk about this??) and the music is just great. Plus that it made order the cd it made me want to take my guitar out again and learn more, weird.

(Kuva: http://thecia.com.au/reviews/o/images/once-5.jpg)

These days

2008-12-26T05:43:00.000-08:00

Our "let´s visit the graveyard"-looks.

White Christmas go go.

Art.

THE Christmas tree and dad who, btw, fought to get that tree standing straight. It was hilarious, but let´s not tell him, at that time it was dead serious..

Love.

2008-12-21T05:24:00.000-08:00

It is the atmosphere that matters in this picture, not those tens of meters of wrapping paper on the table :)

Yes, I am on holidays in my hometown, the pearl of Finland, some may know it as Saarijärvi. I arrived on last Thursday, but must say that today is the first day that I feel like being on holidays. It is not that I´ve been forced to work so hard back home, I guess it just takes time for me, my brain, my body and propably my soul ;) to realize that there is no pressure of anything. (Except that extremely extra-too-much preparatory task,which needs to be done during holidays. COME OOOON, this is our first break during the whole Autumn. Our teachers feel no mercy.)

But despite that very disturbing assignment, today I have felt nice, very nice.

We went to the church in the morning and all my "old" church people were there, it was so good to be in the midst of them. To hear my friends singing, and the kids! They were simply the best, so lovely. And after the service we all stayed to eat christmas porrigde (made by my mum) and some pastries with coffee.

Now it is getting darker again, others are having their day nap and in about an hour or so my brother should come with his family (wife, daughter aged 18, two sons, 5 and 6 year olds). It is so good to see them, haven´t seen them for a such a long time!

Enjoy your loved ones and this time you can spent with them.Terrible to say that you never know, what happens the next day.. I have been thinkin about this for the last weeks. I got an old friend back and she has been through some really tough times, she really appreciates every day of her life. My other friends baby has a serious cancer. It is never nice to face these things, when they happen to your loved and close ones. However, they are a part of life and the more we can enjoy our daily life, the better.

Be blessed, you and your family, friends, spouse, whoever :)

Counting days

2008-12-14T07:38:00.000-08:00

I am so waiting fro my Christmas Holidays already to come. One day school left, then some work shifts and then: off to Saarijärvi :)
This year has passed rather quickly, especially this autumn time, which has been with no break whatsoever (summer holidays was my latest holidy, yay!).
My internet is not working at the moment,thanks to DNA and their crappy customer service. Hope it works out at some point.
Anyway, life´s been good, talk to you later mates!

U-G-L-Y

2008-12-10T06:48:00.001-08:00

Today I feel ugly.
(No need/pressure for telling that I am not, everyone has these days.)

Jåå, men de var rolig!

2008-12-06T06:57:00.000-08:00

Silja Line, Symphony boat. Rather nice.

Stockholm. A christmas tree hanging from the ceiling(!!) in a warehouse and then the old town.

Mmmm, fudge. We had: mint, cherry something, then something else and something and chocolate nougat. You see :)

My desperate moves...

Getting ready for the Las Vegas-show. I know I look evil. Sorry.

Stockholma was nice, weather was pretty gray, which was blaah. I would like to spent some days in Stockholm and see more, this was just a quick visit, but very nice one.

Swedish people are over-all more stylish, have to admit that. Let´s blame H&M for that. Or then they just pay attention a bit more to such things.

Well, in the boat then.. our boat was really nice, with cafes and stuff. In the evening people were pretty drunk, that is not a surpise either.

On our way there it was quite windy and one could feel that in the boat. Poor dance performes had to do their show, though the boat was going uppppppp and doooooown and upppppp and doooown. At some stage it was 17 m/h, but I think that later in the evening it was even more.

All in all, it was nice and relaxing too, I definitely don´t feel like going back to school, which is always a sign of total relaxation.

Well, soon I´m off to my friends place to eat, drink and watch the independence celebration from the presidents castle. It is Finlands 91st Birthday and all the ones that were invited by the president (not me, hmm.) will enter the castle tonight with their costumes and all the rest who were not invited (like me) will judge their outfits. How entertaining is that! Happy independence day, Finland!

ps. tomorrow I am going to meet with an old friend of mine. Our friendship was cut during our rough teenage years :( but luckily it has now been restored, which I´m ver happy about :)

Ok, I´m off to buy some Blueberrypie-ice cream and a relaxed independent evening. Enjoy yourselves!

December!!

2008-12-02T10:52:00.001-08:00

Yes, this is nice. December arrived :)
I have been in school, working and attending church happenings. We had a youth meeting there on Saturday and on Sunday we had a Music Celebration together with the pentacostal church.
Pretty soon we´ll have an exam on something I am not interested in and it has been hard to find any kind of motivation to study for it. So I haven´t studied at all.How great is that.

In two days I will be in a boat cruising to Stockholm. It is such a nice idea to be just chilling and walking around in the old town. *sigh* Then I can come back here and work hard for the last days before Christmas holidays.

I don´t have anything deeper to say right now. Our group work lessons are so deep that it takes the most of my "deep" energy ;)

Christmas arriving piece by piece :)

2008-11-26T07:06:00.000-08:00

Awwww, I came home today and checked my mail and there this was: A Mauri Kunnas-christmas calendar send by my little sister. THANK YOU.
I am pretty attached to Mauri Kunnas´ books, if you didn´t know. When I was small I used to get one of his books every christmas. I even asked for one (a small one) just few years ago. Heh. Anyway, this brings joy to my days until christmas. Rejoice!

This boy is an elf called Ville and thats his doggie dog :)

There is my christmas decoration: olkipukki. He is good company.

Hanniticas challenge

2008-11-25T12:13:00.000-08:00

(Mia in October-rain)

Hannitica (http://www.hannitica.blogspot.com/) challenged me to tell 5 weird things about myself. Hmm, I started thinking and noticed that it was hard to think of any. This weird I think myself to be, you see :D

1. When I take a shower I lock the door to the bathroom, even though I live all alone and there is no real reason for it. I just don´t like the feeling that someone could enter the bathroom if I didn´t lock the door. The question is: where would that someone come? From the balcony?? *goes and checks that the balcony door is locked* I blame the horror movies for this. Haven´t watched any, but still.

2. I love swimming, but everytime when I swim in a lake I am terrified. My imagination runs so wild that I nearly panick and get off as soon as possible. A fish might catch my feet. Or a watery ghost. Or a lake monster. Lots of those in Finland. Lots.

3. I am terrible in remembering lyrics for the songs, when I listen to them from the radio. (If I practice a song for something, it´s different.) Instead I might remember the guitar solo of the song. But not the lyrics.

4. I like the smell of gasoline and strong marker pens , but after a while of enjoyable sniffing they cause me a headache. No, I don´t use them to get high.

5. I get active usually at nine o´clock in the evening. That is the time when I start my school tasks, cleaning, dishwashing, handcrafting, sorting out my wardobe. This is a habbit I don´t like, but I cannot really change it, at least not yet. I would also do my laundry, hoover etc. but my neighbours would not be that excited.

So, weirdos, how about you??

Snow storm!

2008-11-23T02:26:00.000-08:00

Edit: The snow storm turned out to be exactly like in this picture. The electricity was cut during the service in the church, so there we sat, without lights and the pastor started preaching.

Well, our snow storm is not exactly like this, but almost :)

Hmph. Sunday-morning. I slept until 12 o´clock :) How happy can one be after a good night sleep? Answer is: very happy indeed.

Now I am eating Christmas chocolates, which I got from my placement and watching the snow storming outside. Great. I am in here, in my warm (almost, need to take one more sweater) apartment with candles and Christmas lights, ah! Can one already notice that I am a Christmas person? It´s me and my sister together, we are the worse, so to say. We enjoy Christmas. Not that much gifts and buying things, thouhg it is nice to give and receive gifts when they make sense. This meaning that it is something that fits the person the best.

Every Christmas we go to the library and look for christmassy books and kids books (Mauri Kunnas is once again in the top 5!) and then we go home and happily stare at them together. This year we went there in the beginning of November and had to ask the librarian to get a certain book from their Christmas book storage, as they hadn´t yet got the books out officially :)

It was a loads of fun, plus good service! Then we also start a yearly candy strike (hahaha), which means we don´t eat any sweets for a month before Christmas.

Then there is an advertisement of Finnish decoration company called Tiimari. She, my sister, goes through it, marks the stuff she needs (nothing big though, Christmas serviets and do-it-your-self-card-materials) and then we go there together.

These are small things, but we have so much fun preparing. Baking, decorating, fighting about the christmas tree (real or fake one? is the question, but come oooon, a fake christmas tree?!?) and having the time together. Indeed, having the time together.

Now I am eagerly waiting these few coming weeks to pass by, so I will start my holidays. Before that I still have one report to finish, an exam to do (I think), a cruise to Stockholm and so on, so forth. Anyway: enjoy the litttttle things dear people!

Are we humans, or are we dancers?

2008-11-21T13:00:00.000-08:00

That song has been going on in my head for the last hours. They always play it on radio YLEX which I listen to while driving.

I finished my placement today and must say that it was such a great opportunity and I mean this. This is not a Miss Universum "I want world peace"-type of answer, I really liked the place and the job done there.

I made mistakes, I learned a lot, I enjoyed the people, both the workers and the clients, I felt comfortable and capable of doing things. My studies are not exactly the same as finnish socionoms are, though at the end my occupation will be a socionom. The thing is: my group concentrates on community development, whereas in the finnish line one can focus on children and youth, or mental health care, for example. I know I need to find my own way through the studies, as I may not necessarily work as a community development worker.

But who knows, maybe God does a miracle and I will end up as a community development worker. But if it depends on me: I don´t think so :)

Anyway, tomorrow our pre-teen work team will have a pre-teen day organized int he church for the kids. It takes the whole day and should be loads of fun. In the evening a friend comes for a visit, which is great, I haven´t seen her for a while. I know we have a LOT to talk about. Be prepared, Maija!

Now I should clean a bit and go to bed, so I´ll wake up tomorrow and will have strength for the day. People, God is good and faithfull, He cares about us and wants us to feel well on this planet Earth.

That is why He took care of me and the simple things in my life, such as this practice placement :)

You´re great! (Yes, I´m talking about you ;)

Isn´t it ironic? Once again.

2008-11-17T12:36:00.000-08:00

I´m sorry, this week is quite busy and I should also write my placement report, which still has a lot of work to do, so I won´t be propably writing that much here. Ironic, huh?

Anyway I got to know today about a new job opportunity, so I´m changing my working place once again. It goes to better direction all the time. I was a cleaner, than a sort of a nurse without the medical part of it and now I will be working with child welfare in a reception and assessment unit. I am happy about this.

But now I need to start writing so that my report would be ready one day. Hopefully :)

Silence I kill you.

2008-11-13T13:11:00.000-08:00

Yes, it´s finally time to kill the silence here. I got my laptop back AND the internet as well, of course. Guess I´ll write later a bit more detailed update of what´s going on in here ("in here" meaning my life) and so on. Anyway, anyhow, this is something I´ve been up to lately, christmas gifts :)

The day after tomorrow: Estonia, Estonia.

2008-09-23T14:55:00.000-07:00

Hola!

2008-09-21T02:31:00.000-07:00

Hello again, been quite long absent, excuse me for it. It is just that my laptop broke down, totally and I still have not got the new one, so whenever I get online somewhere I need to do other stuff and really do not have time for updating my blog. Sigh. But oh well, Liz came to visit me and brought her laptop also, and as I have internet in my flat, here I am, writing about why I have not been writing.
Yeah, well, the list of broken possession is getting longer as my car has caused some trouble lately. The exhaust pipe will be renewed soon and also the battery might need to be renewed. Yay!!

Whatever. I have been working quite a lot, except now as Liz is visiting me. We went to Helsinki yesterday and now I am trying to look for a day cruise to Estonia. Hopefully we will get there on Thursday :)

Pictures will appear soon, hopefully!
Take care!

argh.

2008-08-18T06:06:00.000-07:00

I just say that after some free time, this all feels like a lot. Essays, presentation, working and that stupid laptop out of order. Argh.

ps. It´s not that serious though. It just takes time to get used to this again.

It´s all about neo-liberalism

2008-08-13T08:36:00.000-07:00

(Picture from Maapallopatsas, Mahlu.)

Yes, back to school next Monday. Actually I went there today already, to find books for this reading week and for the 4 pages essay still ahead. I should write four pages about globalisation, based on books: Globalisation, Global Justice And Social Work and Global Social Policy And Governance. We read together with a friend of mine and came in to conclusion: Life is all about neo-liberialism. What does it mean, is up to you to discover, my dear reader.

Something lighter, I got a nice pair of earrings, thanks to Minna, who saw them first at a second hand store. But she was so noble, that I got them. Thanks Minna, they are my new favourite :)

But off I go, I should be reading now those interesting texts, and eat something as I´m gettin hungry. The problem is: I also have the last book of Harry Potter, wonder if I´ll ever get to read the school material, eh...
Tomorrow I´ll go to work and on Friday we´ll start our youth camp lasting over the weekend.

ps. My other cheek is slightly swollen and I have a one tooth less, it also lessened my wisdom, sigh.

Take care of yourselves, people and enjoy lifes small things as they come along!

Wild wild party

2008-08-04T07:42:00.000-07:00

Yes, we had a wild party last weekend :) My sister went through (as if it was a huge suffering for her) a two weeks of youth camping with a special purpose: to get to know the church better at the age of fifteen. In lutheran church it is called a confirmation camp, in Free Evangelical Church it includes same subjects in teaching but does not have the official confirmation part in it. Complicated enough?
Well, anyway it is important part of life and she was happy with her own experience of the camp. God was good and still is :)

My mum and I drove up to Rantsila, which is 250 km north from here, we went to see my one and only granny. We stayed only for one night, but it was good to see her and some other relatives. Tomorrow our group Varikset is attending a special Sunday Services located at country side :) I´m liking the idea, though I didn´t attend the rehearsals, eh..

It will be okay, I hope. At least we´ll have loads of fun.

Now I need to go again and spent some quality time with my little sis, as I´m leaving soon.

Talk to you later!

2008-07-24T13:46:00.000-07:00

I am just having free time, to stay up late, wake up late, to be lazy and not getting anything done. Ah, just perfect. I have been reading like crazy and enjoying planning my days as I want to. I have been meeting friends, helping at home and planning coming weeks. As if anything should be planned ;) My sister left for the camp on Tuesday and she´ll be there for 12 days, it took some time to get used to that she´s not around the whole time. But then again: we´ll have a nice confirmation party for her as she comes back and what could be nicer than planning the party, what to bake, how to decorate and other relevant issues, you see.
I have read almost five Harry Potter books and one other kind: Baby Jane, by Sofi Oksanen. She´s a finnish writer and her books have been on media, so it got me interested and I started from the shortest. It was quite a dark book, nothing too special or world changing, but good enough so that I´ll read the next one with a totally different topic.

Oh well, the world,where the only trouble is what to read next, is calling me, so I´m off again. And I should also propably sleep tonight.

The Tales Of The Thing

2008-07-15T12:03:00.000-07:00

Here some pictures of my every day life in Finland. I wish.

Oh yes, we had a great time today while shooting our very own film called The Tales of The Thing. It´s pretty unique story of a certain Thing that needs to be protected by its carrier and then it´s stolen, how terrible. Haa haa ha haa.

Oh boy, we had good laughs. Or at least I did, several times. I should live long.

Ps. This is a part of a youth camp we´ll be leading in August, just need some preparation beforehand ;)

Tired

2008-07-08T06:41:00.000-07:00

Today I´m tired and will try to stay awake few more hours, so I can go to bed early early early and be amazingly energetic tomorrow. I´m realizing that I will be working 11 days in a row and I need my sleep. Oh, boring adulthood comes with such restrictions, sigh.
Anyway, I have only three more cleaning days left (REJOICE!) and then I´ll work with old people again, the great ones with dementia and other serious things. As life goes on as such, I´ve noticed that I´ve been more satisfied lately, again.. Maybe it´s the hormones, maybe I needed to get sick last week in order to continue my relaxed weekend.
Oh well, I guess I´ll start wathing a movie and to read my second Harry Potter. You know, I usually set goals for my summer time, that there will be things I need to do or reach or learn or whatever. Sometimes it´s traveling somewhere, sometimes it´s learning something, like how to play drums (I never did that and was so disappointed!) and this summer I wanted to read all Harry Potters and I must say they are good :) Not that I would have read them all yet.
Go home and read, you people.

Summer here, summer there

2008-06-27T08:56:00.000-07:00

As I´ve been working last weeks, and as I work alone most of the time, I have plenty of time to think all sorts of.. things. And I´ve been thinking that if Finnish summer -08 were a person (yes, this is very essential) , she/he would:

-have an umbrella with him/her all the time and everywhere, just in case
-be manic-depressive

- while being angry, being extremely angry, like thunder and storm

- while crying, crying her/his eyes out, like pouring rain

- eat a lot of ice-cream, sausage, beer and have a sauna every day, despite all of this

And he/she were my summer, she/he would propably be working all the time :)
Anyways, last weekend I had free time and my mum is came to visit me. We had a mission: to find her a nice dress for my little sisters confirmation celebration. And maybe did some other shopping too as the big sales are going on, eh.

This town was full of people , one of the biggest blues festivals in Europe (or that´s what THEY say) was going on last week and weekend. Yay. It´s nice, they had all these little booths with nice stuff to be bought. If someone could afford. Ha. We found some nice thing from there and ate pita bread filled with kebab meat and vegetables.. and it was ok, but not the best kebab ever.

I think some of my stress was relieved as I had such a good time with my mum and so on Sunday evening I got sick and this is my second day on sick leaf, one more to go tomorrow and then I need to get back to work. That´s life.

Oh and by the way: here´s my view of this years Midsummer Festival:

So sad. So so so sad.

Pihlajasaari

2008-06-22T11:47:00.000-07:00

She´s loving it :)

About a week ago I visited one of the small islands on front of Helsinki, named Pihlajasaari. My friend took me there and I have to say she´s pretty attached to her camera. Takes great pictures though.

We had a bit of a challeng in actually getting there, as we needed to take a tram and then that specific tram was out of order because there was a fire next to the presidents castle. And the tram should have passed that place, which was naturally occupied by firefighters etc, so the tram could not take its usual route. (Yeah, that´s right.) Then we needed to catch a certain bus, and first find a certain bus stop. When we were in harbour we needed to find where a certain boat departs. Oh well, while searching for it we had some italian ice cream and nice shots, so it was not bad at all. She had coconut, I had mocca, yummy!

Weather was not that great at the end, but we had a good time. Nature was nice, birds were not agressive/angry and people not too drunk yet, so good circumstances for a nice picnic and chilling :) Thanks mate!

Confession to make

2008-06-21T11:24:00.001-07:00

Todays confession: I´m lost. I feel lost. What does it mean then?
There´s God in my life, so I shall never be lost.
There´s clear future: school starts in August and sooner or later I´ll have a profession,
I´m not lost.
I have a job, so economically not lost either.. Oh well, students are always though :)
I just feel like a bit lost. It´s hard to explain why.. Mainly I recognise it from not feeling really anything. Which is also a bit weird for me, as emotional I am.
I don´t know from what I´m lost and why. I just feel like it. Sigh. And argh.
Ps. Maybe it´s just a feeling that passes by as they always do, right?

And they lived happily ever after

2008-06-12T11:49:00.000-07:00

She is getting marrieeeeeed.

And they are exciteeeeeeeeed.

Almost there.

So just married.

Happily ever after, in rise rain against EU-regulations, HAAHAA.

THE couple.

And so they lived happily ever after. It was great fun seeing them doing that and being a part of it :) Grrrreat.

Hedgehog hunter

2008-06-04T12:21:00.000-07:00

This past week I started working full-time (yay.) and my little sister came to stay with me for five days. On Friday we´ll drive to my hometown again (again because we just came on Sunday) and I´ll start preparing the wedding on Saturday.

We, meaning THE bride and us, two bridemades, will be spending the night before together at a cottage, preparing the bride for her wedding. Meaning: eating, laughing and panicking until the dawn. Propably also having a sauna. Exciting.

Well, about the past days, here are some pics that will tell what we´ve have done when I´ve come home from work... This is wild, be prepared.

On Monday we watched Harry Potter movie number four, named whatever and ate not so healthy things. BUT, I have my defence: I blame Filmtown, the movie renting company, they have an offer of movies only for 1 euro/day for the whole June!!! And the sweet stuff, eh, we´re on vacation... and my sister was just two and half months not eating candies, so she needed her revenge.

Yesterday: Marie Antoinette, just BECAUSE. And well, watching that, you need to have marshmellows and other stuff. (Notice, my plate on the left, hers on the right.

And today we went to a second hand store and I found absolutely adorable plates, six of them for 3 euros. I love the style and the idea of recycled retro plates :) I also found the tiniest shoes ever for my friends baby, who is about to be born in about weeks time. My sister found a really beautiful shirt for 3 euros, sorry to not to have picture of it. And then I bought a smaaaaal soap, which was pretty. Eyecandy, you see.

Well, off I go, need to write the programme for Saturdays wedding party and tomorrow: start working at 7 am.

Enjoy your summer, whatever it may be!!!

A Pink Bridal Shower, Forest Family And Bowling Shoes.

2008-05-29T01:13:00.000-07:00

Yep, I´m on vacation in Saarijärvi, doing stuff and being with people as you can see.

I should have something to say, I know I should

2008-05-22T03:31:00.000-07:00

I read a lot of different kind of blogs: my friends, fashion, photographing (they simply have great pictures: eyecandy for someone who enjoys visual things), life styles and also blogs that have something to say about something: politics, religion, God, mission etc.

Then I think of this blog and I would love to have something to say, I would. I would love to have strong opinions to write down, or deep thoughts. But I don´t. Or I do, but they never end up in here. I end up writing of how I´m doing, what´s up with me and stuff, and that´s fine. People whom I don´t meet daily can read it from here.. Maybe I don´t have that much to explain next time then, when we meet.

But I have noticed that this " not having opinions"-thing applies to other areas in my life as well.. I notice how easily I just agree with people, or don´t state my own black and white opinions. The thing is: I don´t have that black and white opinions, so many times I just somehow understand what people are saying, about their own choices or whatever, thoug I wouldn´t agree with that. Of course I´ll say if I don´t agree, but too many times I´m silent, I´ve noticed. Hmm.

In person I might be loud, outgoing etc. but I am not brave. What a confession.

Of course it depends on person as well.. and the situation and the issue. When it comes to what socks I´ll wear or what to do with my life, it´s different, of course.

And there are times when I say what I think. Maybe even more I could think of. Maybe I´m demanding too much from myself. Or maybe God wants me to think of this.

Hah, think about this, it all started with all the other blogs I´m following and ended up with me questioning my courage. Oh well, that´s life.

She caught a flu, what to do?

2008-05-19T00:18:00.001-07:00

Yes, I caught the flue, thanks to the kindergarten and all the agressive bacterials, ignoring my effective hand hygiene. Mphmh..

(This not so healthy picture is taken in Sweden, coming back from Poland last Spring. Oh man, it´s already a year ago.)

So I don´t participate on the practical placement evaluation seminar, neither could I finish my report on time, which sucks. On the other hand, that´s life, it happens.
Anyway, I had a good time during the weekend, I was helping at my friends fathers 50th birthday celebration and the evening ended with a room full of shouting Finns watching Finland-Sweden hockey game, (which, by the way Finland won 4-0)
That was rather an intensive experience, hahahaa.

Now I´m just wondering around, though not too much or my head starts to hurt. I read, hang in here and try to realize how am I feeling. Am I well enough to start finishing my report or I am just not well enough so I can watch movies and read books? Hmm...

Anyway, enjoy your healthy Monday, guys!!

Det gör ingenting och allt

2008-05-15T13:32:00.000-07:00

It means nothing and all.

Well, we had our oral exam on professional swedish today and I sucked and talked too much as it was a group task.. so I didn´t feel too happy with it. I´ll pass the course and get my grades on "professional swedish", but it just did not create a good feeling for me as I didn´t realize to shut up and let others talk. Time passed so fast and all.. I didn´t think I talked so much, as my speaking was so slow anyway, but apparently I did and ignored it, which made me feel pretty damn stupid. Oh well, what is done is done and past.

In order to graduate from here we need to have official grades that prove that we have gained a certain level of professional swedish, meaning swedish skills in order to provide services with that language. We are a bi-lingual country after all, I just don´t remember that too often as I have grown in an area where it really does not show or mean anything.

Nowadays I like the language and would like to be more fluent with it. And if someone would have told this to 14 year old Saila, who struggled with compulsory swedish, it would have made her cry & laugh at the same time. But yes, I do like it nowadays.

However, I am traumatized now for good.

Mad rush

2008-05-14T08:02:00.000-07:00

I have been thinking of all sorts of thoughts lately, mainly in the evening time, when I´m supposed to sleep. Ha. I did not sleep enough during the weekend and did not sleep enough this week, but that is totally my own fault. Anyhow, today I went to look over the younger kids of our day care (where I´m doing my practise placement) while they were having their nap time. Well well, look who was sleeping there. I literally fell asleep twice at least, hilarious. The kids were so silent and each one of them were really sleeping, so that I needn´t do anything really, so I took the advantage. What a nice way to spend my practise placement: sleeping.

Anyway, I have been thinking of:

-how much persons country/origin/nationality/language molds the personality

-how in nowadays society we need to exist in a way that can be calculated, put in to statistics and controlled, in a way

This sounds so incredibly intelligent, doesn´t it... not. I have no great conclusions whatsoever :) Just thinking. Hmm...

This week I also had to talk to kids about how to handle rubbish, junk etc. "When you eat sweets, where do you put the wrap paper o?" "What about when there´s no bin near?" And other important questions. It is an environment-theme week this week, we talk about nature, recycling and stuff like that. I like it a lot! And the kids, they just know so much already, impressing. (Well, they have had an environment-theme the whole year.)

More random thoughts?? Yes, I did the paper work (or the lady did it for me) for my own car, so now I´m officially a car owner!! Congratulate, please ;)

ps. last days of school, exams, reports etc. are ahead... I´m just so in summer mode already.

Isn´t it ironic?

2008-05-11T10:02:00.000-07:00

An old man turned ninety-eight
He won the lottery and died the next day
It's a black fly in your Chardonnay
It's a death row pardon two minutes too late
Isn't it ironic ... don't you think

It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought ... it figures

Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly
He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids good-bye
He waited his whole damn life to take that flight
And as the plane crashed down he thought 'Well isn't this nice...'
And isn't it ironic ... don't you think

Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and everything's going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up in your face

It's a traffic jam when you're already late
It's a no-smoking sign on your cigarette break
It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife
It's meeting the man of my dreams
And then meeting his beautiful wife

And isn't it ironic... don't you think.
A little too ironic... and yeah I really do think.

(Ironic by Alanis Morissette)

Being like a gardener

2008-05-04T05:08:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I became a gardener for a while and opened the summer garden season for my own balcony. Summer, you´re welcome.

Dusting dustless books

2008-05-02T10:49:00.000-07:00

Today I worked. For 13 hours, at least. It meant that I woke up in the morning at 5 and came home after 8, though there was some visits in between. Out of this 13 hours of work, I was cleaning books in a library for 9 hours, and it was insane. It seemed like they would never ever end.. and it felt like that too. Just imagine shelfs of books and you need take them out, wipe them, put them back, every single one of them.

At first, I was excited: I like alphabets, (I love dictionaries, one of my weird desires, I know.), libraries and especially books. So, let´s say for the first 30 minutes I was simply taken away by the valuable task I had, but then... it started to feel meaningless and just a task. We were all together 8 ladies cleaning there and it took many many hours.

Well, this is just a part of my life: cleaning job. This task was just so extraordinary that I wanted to share it with you guys.

Otherwise, life is quite fine here, THE SUMMER is arriving, trees are a lot more green, evenings are bright and warm, the barbeque and cottage season 2008 was officially opened this last Wednesday, I can bike everywhere and I will bike everywhere :) So, things are not bad at all. And oh yeah, I will get a car!!! (It might mean that I´m not biking anywhere, at least while working, as the distances are rather long.) It will be my bery first own car. It will be seen here later, as soon as I just get it :)

No sunshine

2008-04-23T12:53:00.000-07:00

Annoyed, annoyed, annoyed, annoyed and sleepy. That´s about it.
Before this day was nice, quite nice. Kids, a home decoration info and stuff.
Weird how one little thing can change it all in to a huge annoyment and one has to live with it all. Annoying.

Learning

2008-04-22T04:43:00.000-07:00

At the moment I am doing my practical placement in a kindergarten and I´ve noticed that I can learn a lot of new things there.
For example: it takes three days to travel to the moon (because a tv-programme said so). And that all water is underneath the ground, traveling in pipes. All the water.
These were only few of the things that those kids can teach to me. And I appreciate it.